You don't want to take the responsibility and use your freedom to make a decision which will forever influence the direction in which the story will advance?
Just think about it:
Not many people have this privilege.
Most can only wait and observe.
Or maybe that's not it?
Maybe you don't want to make this choice because you want to be both of them?
You want to see both perspectives to get the most complete experience?
Actually, this can be done.
We have already handled multiple layers of reality at the same time.
This wouldn't be very different.
Just remember that this way you take double responsibility.
And you have to be careful so that it is always clear who is who and who is supposed to do what.